The last Dagoon of Tilland
by Winged-Magus
Summary: one day Valmont runs into one of Shendu's former body guards. All is well it seems and now Shendu is required to retreive a new body guard. Only, things aren't as they seem.


The last Dragon  
  
Valmont looked up from his book and noticed that the others in the car were staring at him. "What? Is there something wrong?" He grumbled, closing his book with a grunt of disapproval. Finn looked away and then back at him. " Big V, we're all kinda worried that this demon possession stuff. I mean, not to make a certain demon angry, but we sort of feel like this has gone on long enough." The man looked to the others for support. Ratso and Chow turned away and began to pretend they hadn't heard the comment. Shendu awakened inside Valmont's head and began to hiss angrily. " You humans have been given the chance to partake in the freeing of all my brothers and sisters. You will be the only people left in this world by the time they are released and all you can do is complain about possession. I am not going to tell you anymore." It hissed.  
  
Valmont frowned and then picked up his book again and continued with his reading. Shendu hissed at him in annoyance. " Why aren't you telling your employees to shut up Valmont?" It ordered. The tall blonde haired man shrugged. " You win some and you lose some. It's better just to let things be for the time being." Impatiently, the demon began to take control of Valmont's body. Swinging his fists, he began to swat at Finn. The red haired man dodged and pulled him self back next to his seat.  
  
The demon began curse Valmont in a steady stream. " Stupid insolent humans! You should be cowering in fear when you insult a demon!" It yelled angrily. Valmont rolled his eyes and tried to continue with his book once again. Finally, Shendu began to calm down and lie dormant once again. Suddenly the car lurched to a stop. Valmont was hurled across the inside of the limo and landed roughly on top of Chow. Grumbling to himself, he got off the squished man and righted himself. "What in the name of hell was that!?" He cursed. Ratso rolled down the window that separated the inside from the driver's spot and explained. " Hak Fuu thought he saw a kid jump in front of the limo boss."  
  
Valmont sighed. This was going to be the most annoying day in his life apart from the fact that he had to share his body with a stupid demon that was REALLY starting to drive him insane. He heard the car door slam shut and then the sound of a scuffle followed by a loud groan of pain and a thump. Finn raised an eyebrow in surprise.  
  
Chow turned to the door and watched as the scuffle began to escalate. Shendu burst into Valmont's conscious thought and began to belt out orders. " You three get out there and find out what is going on! I am not going to be happy if Chan is out there and has taken the Han Ku box!" He exclaimed. Valmont sighed again and allowed himself the fleeting feeling of impatience. Ratso bolted out into the street and joined in. There was a smash as he was tossed through the windshield. Finn and Chow bolted out into the street and were promptly beaten to a pulp. Suddenly, the limo's door was yanked off by something that seemed to be made of pure muscle. Startled, Valmont drew himself further into the car and was promptly dragged out by his legs. He dangled precariously from his feet near the face of the thing, his hair streaming down towards the ground. It seemed amused by the choice of clothing he was wearing.  
  
Luckily, he always wore a pair of pants under the formal Chinese robe that Shendu insisted on wearing. The robe/skirt slide down his thighs and stopped midway to his chest. "I am happy to see you again Shendu. It has been quite some time master." The thing hissed. Valmont felt hostility fill his shared mind. Shendu began to speak. "So. Lu Lei. You have returned from your homeland. It has to be at least two hundred years by now since I have had the pleasure of seeing you. Would you mind putting me down? It would be much appreciated."  
  
The woman dropped him to the ground. Knocking the dust from his robes, Shendu smiled at the being standing before him. " You always were a good body guard Lu. What brings you here to our dimension? Any specific reason for your appearance?" The woman smiled and shook her head.  
  
" I have finally come to take my place as your body guard. Or at least my daughter had come to take my place. She is the last of the dragons in our world and I think you will be very pleased with her training. She has enough power to destroy many things my master." The woman kneeled in a bow. Shendu blinked in surprise. " Why did you not inform me of your marriage Lu? This disappoints me greatly. I expected to be informed about all changes that took place in your life." Shendu snickered. The bodyguard smiled and stood up. " She will be in your command as soon as she arrives from homeland sire. I dare say more or risk spoiling the surprise." The woman smiled. Shendu tapped his foot in impatience. " What makes you think I need a body guard? I have several can you not see them?" He said, tapping his foot. The woman looked around and then back to Shendu. " I see no bodyguards my lord, only weak followers who cannot even defend themselves let alone protect one such as yourself." She said, smiling slightly.  
  
Finn, Ratso, Chow and Hak Fuu grumbled angrily amongst themselves. A quick look from Shendu silenced the grumbling almost instantly.  
  
Valmont felt like he was unable to even speak. How could Shendu employ a bodyguard without his permission? It was a stupid unreasonable risk that shouldn't have been taken. He thought of how to say this in an unoffensive manner and then decided against speaking at all. There was no sense in angering a demon that lived directly in your head. Shendu turned from the crowd of grumblers and looked into the strange female's eyes. "When will we be expecting your daughter Lu? Perhaps soon? That would be much better then later." It commented.  
  
The woman laughed lightly. " She will arrive on the hour of eve. This is all I can say except where you can find her. She will be waiting in the hollowed forest next to the sacred lake." The woman's voice echoed and then they noticed that she was gone. Shendu joined the others in a blink of surprise and then slight confusion. "So, when will we expect to pick up this girl anyway?" Finn asked, scratching his head.  
  
Shendu turned to his servant and spoke in slow short words. " She will arrive tonight at midnight. Where is the only question we need to solve at present." It said. Valmont took back his body with a startled grunt. " What do you mean by where is the only question we need to solve? Shouldn't you know? I mean you know this person better then the rest of us." He grumbled. Shendu did not respond. Shrugging, Finn turned back to the limo, which was in bad condition. "Sheesh. Why didn't she just knock like a normal person." He grumbled shaking his head. ____________________________________________________________________________ _  
  
Two hours later, they were sitting in the hideout frantically trying to figure out where the hollowed forest was. Chow sat hunched over a book, his eyeballs pressed against the page so that he wouldn't miss a single word.  
  
Valmont looked at him with admiration. That was, until he noticed that Chow was drooling on the page and he hadn't changed pages in the past twenty minutes. "Wake him up!" He grumbled. Finn looked up from his book and picked up a ruler. He stretched his arm out and poked the sleeper.  
  
Chow shot upright in a flash of black and white, the page still stuck to his head. Valmont smacked his own head in exasperation. "Sorry boss man. I guess I drifted off." He said sheepishly. It was then that Ratso began to snore loudly. All eyes flashed to the sleeping form holding a book at chest level. Finn smacked the ruler across his head. Ratso woke with a start. "What the fu- oh sorry boss man. Guess I drifted off." He said sheepishly. Valmont looked unimpressed. "I ask only one thing of you.and what do you do? Two of you fall asleep and one manages to poke the others with a ruler. This is becoming a pain in the ass." He grumbled.  
  
Shendu hissed and started to scold the sleepers. "How dare you rest when you know that if we don't find this new member that I will kill all of you?!" It yelled, flames bursting from his mouth. Valmont made a dash for the cup of water he always kept near just in case of flaming mouth. Downing it, he looked at his ragtag group of thieves.  
  
It was hard to believe that this group of men was the notorious dark hand. It was hard to believe that they had once been able to pull off a heist in almost all of the art museums in all of the USA. Ratso made the mistake of yawning sleepily.  
  
Flames burst from his parched throat in an instant. Valmont picked up the cup once again and downed the cold water thankfully. Chow plucked the page from his face and jumped up. "Holy shit! I've been sleeping on it! It says that this hollowed forest place is central park. Or it used to be central park. And the lake must be.No! Damn! There's no reference to any lake here." He scowled dejectedly. Valmont smiled. " I guess all that sleep made it easy to look at that page eh Chow? Maybe you should read it before you sleep on it." He snickered amused.  
  
Chow sent him a dirty look and then realized what he had done and jolted behind Finn. Valmont blinked and then realized what Chow was so scared of. But it appeared that Shendu had decided to take a breather and wasn't paying attention. "Don't worry. At least you found out where were supposed to go." He shrugged and turned from the cowering man to his cup again. Finn flipped a page and then got up and walked over to Valmont. "Boss man. I think we just found out where this sacred lake is. Says here that at midnight on the thirtieth of January, Today! That this lake thing just comes up from the ground in the dead center of Central park. And it also says that the middle of central park is.oh shit.the big old cemetery in the northwest half of the old park lands. I guess the lake appears in the middle of the cemetery.gross." Finn made a face and then passed the book to Valmont for closer inspection. Valmont nodded in agreement. "Gross is right. Apparently this cemetery gives way to the lake of the dead. Pleasant name don't you agree. It also says that the only place safe when the lake appears is on top of the star of light. What ever that is."  
  
The book closed in a gust of misty dust. Sneezing, Finn took the book back and then began to examine another. " So now we gotta find this star of light thing is. It must be there in the graveyard with the rest of the corpses. Or maybe it appears when the lake comes." A light cold wind ripped through the small room.  
  
Shivering, Chow drew his coat closer around his body. "Maybe isn't good enough at the moment. We have to be sure that we have the right place or were dead lake toast. Do you catch my drift? This lake may be peaceful or it might be hostile, but either way we have to be sure we have the right place."  
  
This signaled the end of talking and the browsing of more books. Twenty minutes later, Ratso discovered the answer. " Boss this is what I think it is is it? I mean, you don't just come across a page with a really creepy picture and think it's a coincidence. I mean, this thing looks like it is filled with.spirits of the dead. Guess that's why it's called the lake of the dead." He shrugged and handed to book to Valmont. With one quick scan, he was sure of where to go. " This picture shows the biggest tomb in the entire place. And I guess we have to stand on top of it in order to keep from getting sucked into the lake. It says here that anyone who touches the lakes waters will be sucked down into the depth never to return that is unless you have a pure heart and can swim. Eww. That's gross. It shows this nasty picture of this old lady with a head in her hand. And I don't even want to know what that is."  
  
He closed the book with a snap. "Let's not look in that book anymore. Lest I lose my lunch on that page." He handed the book to Finn who diligently looked for the page, then upon finding it set about showing the rest of them making Chow turn green and Hak Fuu shudder. " I think that's enough of that." The red head said, looking at the page himself and then tossing it into the vast pile that had appeared on the table. Shendu awakened to tell them that they had about six hours to go before they had to get to the hollowed forest and then stuffed himself back down into Valmont's subconscious. Finn dusted off his pants and looked up at Chow. " So.anyone hungry cuz I'm starving." ____________________________________________________________________________ _  
  
The six hours passed in relative ease, with only two or three complains each half hour. Ratso kept insisting that his mother had told him to never go into central park after dark. " But she told be to watch out for hoodlums." He whined.  
  
Finn shook his head and laughed in exasperation. "You idiot. We are the hoodlums." Chow insisted that he was feeling sick and shouldn't go unless the rest of them wanted to sit in a puke filled car. Valmont poked him in annoyance. "Take an Advil and you'll be fine. No more complaints. We have to go." He grumbled. Finn suddenly spoke up. " Dude. What if we can't get to the cemetery on time? What happens then? Does the chick show up and disappear on us or what?"  
  
Valmont looked baffled. " How should I know? Just because I have a demon in my body doesn't mean I know the answer to questions like that." He sat down on a chair and then began to probe his thoughts. Shendu seemed to be taking a nap. Either that or he was going to wake up later and drive him insane.  
  
Ratso finally got up and looked at the clock. " We have to go now or else we won't make it on time." He said, pointing to the clock. He led the way down to the car and proceeded to start the limo up. Of course they had to take the second limo because the first one was slightly damaged.  
  
  
  
Driving along, Ratso began to sing along with the tune of the radio. Finn kept looking at his watch. Hak Fuu looked around the car several times and then went back to staring at the inside wall nearest the back of the limo.  
  
Chow began to drum insanely on every available surface, whether it was the seat, the wall or his own arm. Between the tapping and then singing, Valmont was beginning to feel like killing the lot of them right then and there.  
  
"Would you lay off with the singing? And for fucks sake, stop tapping!" Chow stuck out his tongue at the tall blonde and then started to drum louder. Ratso shut up and began to drive in silence, occasionally humming along with Kyle Minogue.  
  
Finn kept staring into his watch, as if expecting it to explode or attack him. The Limo lurched to a stop, sending all of the passengers into the middle of the limo's floor. Grumbling, Valmont picked Finn out of his hair and pushed Hak Fuu off of his back. This was going to be a long day, or night which ever.  
  
Ratso stood in front of the car's hood, his eyes glued to the moon. " Look at that. Looks like it's going to rain." He commented briskly. And with that, the clouds burst apart and showered them all with cold, wet rain. Valmont cursed under his breath. Damned rain. " Hey. It could be worse. We could just end up in the bloody lake of the dead too." He grumbled. Finn looked like he was going to throw up. Valmont noticed what it was that had made his employee almost retch. There hanging from one of the branches as a man with slit wrists and blood pouring down his rain drenched body. " I shouldn't have said anything."  
  
He moaned, pinching his nose with his fingers and slamming his eyelids shut. "Get ride of that would you Hak Fuu. Hak Fuu?" He peeked from a tiny slit in his eyelids and then sighed. Hak Fuu hadn't gotten out of the car. Or to make things clearer, he had run back into the car. There was mild confusion and then Finn tore off his jacket and covered his head with it. " Let's just get to the fucking lake and get that fucking girl before this gets worse." He led the way, running past the hanging body and up a narrow heavily trodden stone path.  
  
Hak Fuu had to be pried from the car and ended up running ahead of them. Chow blinked and then turned to Valmont who was standing nearest to him.  
  
" So how do we get in? I mean, isn't there supposed to be someway to get inside that graveyard without, you know.stepping on someone's grave." He cringed at the thought. Valmont shrugged. " Finn would you wait up. How the hell are we supposed to get-" he was cut off by the sound of the graveyard's rusted metal gates being thrown open.  
  
Finn smiled in a scared creped out way. " Lady's first." A rock flew from somewhere. This was followed by a grunt and then laughter. Spitting grass from his mouth, Valmont pulled himself from the dirt and began to lick his dry lips. Damned graveyard grass.  
  
Tasted like death. Though how he knew that he wasn't sure. Damned wet cemetery grass. A dark look tore through his eyes in a flash. There before him stood the tomb of the star of light. Whoever that was. Finn whistled. " Nice place they got here. Must have one hell of a view for being built that bloody high." Ratso pulled himself slightly behind Finn and pointed to the top of the stone structure. " Is it me or is that a head up there?" He asked, blanching slightly. Valmont took a closer look and then shuddered.  
  
"It's a head alright. But I think it's fake. I hope it's fake." He mumbled half to himself. Finn was nowhere to be seen now. Valmont turned around and tried to locate him, but was unable to. It was then that the head landed on his head.  
  
Yelping in confusion, Valmont swatted the thing off and began to back up rubbing his head. Laughter filled the cold rainy night air. Finn had managed to scale the tomb. He stood on top peering out across the horizon, baffled by what he saw. There atop the stones was a wispy flag; so old its emblem was unidentifiable. And leaning against it was the body that belonged to the head. He jumped back in surprise and almost fell off the roof. Moments later, he was joined by the other four. " Must be what's left after you fall in the lake."  
  
He laughed slightly hysterical. Valmont shuddered and drew his dress/robe thingy closer around his body. Rain tumbled down the side of his face, blurring his vision. And it almost seemed like the body had moved when Finn had spoken.  
  
Blinking in surprise, he leaned closer and was rewarded with the stench of death once again. " Did anyone check to make sure that thing's head wasn't still attached recently?" He asked, puzzled by the movement. Finn's voice wavered as he spoke. " By the feeling of it, that's been dead for a really long time." Hak Fuu looked down at the ground and then nodded.  
  
The head lay resting against an over turned tombstone. It's flesh hanging from the bones and it's eyes open and glinting. " OK. Now I'm freaked. That thing had its eyes closed when I threw it down." Finn said, shaking slightly. Valmont looked concernedly to the ground. "You must have knocked its eyes open.yeah.that's right." He said, reassuring himself. Chow began to count down. " 10.9.8.7.6.5.4.3.2.1.happy dead lake." He half whispered. Finn looked to the sky. Nothing had happened. "Maybe this is the wrong place." He mused.  
  
Suddenly the sky tore open revealing the liquid death that lived in the atmosphere.  
  
He watched as the disgusting gray blue water fell down in coulombs into the center of the graveyard. He watched as the head rose in the growing water level. It bobbed towards them, gliding on the current.  
  
Finn's eyes followed its path, unable to take his eyes off of it. The wind began to pick up, tossing the smelly water all over the place. Valmont felt Shendu wake up inside his head. " This is the lake of the dead Valmont. How did you locate the sacred forest so easily?" It asked confused.  
  
Valmont smiled and then refused to answer. "You figure it out Shendu. This is your idea anyway." He shrugged and brushed his wet hair back from his face. There was a loud wailing noise that seemed to tear through the wind. Shuddering, Ratso cowered slightly behind Finn and Chow.  
  
Suddenly, spirits began to clutter the air, making it almost impossible to breathe anymore. The stench of death grew stronger and then the body by the flag began to stand up. The head launched itself up onto the tomb and attached itself to its body. The eyeballs rolled in their sockets and its tongue lolled in it's parched decaying throat.  
  
Jumping back with a cry, Finn nearly sailed off the side and into the abyss. Chow grabbed him just as he fell downward. Hands began to reach up from the grimy water, pulling and stretching to reach the only alive man they had seen in years. Yelping in fear, Finn was drawn up on to the top in an instant. The dead thing seemed interested in the five men on the roof. It reached out as if to touch them and then recoiled in almost certain happiness. "So the alive ones have returned to the lake of the dead. You sshouldn't be here now.tthis place is not welcome to humans who still breathe." It hissed. Shendu took over control instantly.  
  
" You are speaking to Shendu, Demon of the world. I am far your superior you useless sack of flesh and bones. You will lead me to the woman I am looking for. Or suffer the consequence of being thrown back into that lake. Do you understand?" The demon smiled and pointed down to the ever- rising water level. The zombie seemed to understand Shendu and shook it's head in dismay. " Never have I been so disgraced by a human. I am the gatekeeper of the sacred forest. The place you seek is out of bounds for humans. But since one of you possesses the soul of a demon, then I deem it safe for the rest of you to travel in the sacred forest. Beware of the lake's dark waters. Or you shall pay the eternal price of being trapped along with the doomed souls in this place.only to be freed when the lake is full and they can find someone to replace their being with. Such is the way of the doomed dead. Beware of the illusions of the forest. They will give no man the deemed road without trickery. Beware of the forest creatures. They don't take well to strangers.but most of all beware of the time limit. If you remain inside the forest when the fire rises high in the sky, you will forever be trapped inside its keep. This is the way of the dead, be it life or death we cannot escape nor live again. Such is the way of the lake. Only one with the pure heart may enter the lakes depth and return alive and unharmed. Now go. I will open the gateway to hell. It is your job demon to make sure that you return through these gates or forever may your destiny hold them to this world." It reached out and plucked the flag and began to wave its prize. A gate appeared on top of the emblem of a golden star.  
  
The forest appeared in a flash of crimson and blood. Its tall trees covered with thorns and skeletons of past adventurers. Suddenly, Valmont was having second thoughts. " Maybe we should just stay-" But he didn't have the time to utter another word. Shendu took over his mind and pulled his terrified servant into the sacred forest of the dead. Reluctantly Finn and the others followed, lagging behind as if to bolt when no one was looking. Confidently Shendu led them down path after path, zigzagging around the forest.  
  
It seemed as soon as they got nearer to the middle, the more restless the living dead became. They began to plague the travelers, attacking those lagging behind and throwing skulls at the leader. Shendu was becoming impatient. He stopped in the center of the path and shot flames out of Valmont's mouth, burning the nearest undead thing to a crisp. He smiled to himself. After that, the undead left them alone and did not cause as many problems.  
  
Finn looked down at his watch and activated the indiglow. The time flashed up in a green pulse and then disappeared into the cold night air. They had about four more hours left till dawn. "Boss man.I hate to tell you this but we've only got four more hours left till dawn.and if we want to make it out in time, we'd better find this bodyguard and get the hell out of here fast." This comment quickened the pace.  
  
Finally, after what seemed like hours, they reached the meadow where the dead had ceased to enter. " Guess this is the place huh big V." Finn commented, kicking at a tuft of long dead grass. It crumbled and flew into the wind in a gust of green. Shendu jumped onto a stump and began to shout at the top of his lungs. " If you were sent here to protect me.Hurry and get here!" Silence answered the call. And then something sailed down to the ground. A single white feather landed next to his foot. Blinking, Chow picked it up and examined it. "Looks like a regular feather boss. This the thing that's going to protect you?" He chuckled. Shendu did not look amused. " If you are here answer me!" He hollered.  
  
Another feather fell to the ground. It was then that Ratso decided to look up into the sky. There suspended above the trees was a portal of vibrant colours. It flashed violet once and then a dark navy blue and then shimmered and disappeared into the sky. And then it reappeared on the ground directly in front of Valmont.  
  
Jumping back, Shendu steadied Valmont's surprise with his will. The portal shimmered once more. A hand tore through the filmy layer of colour and was followed by another hand and then a body. A young woman stepped from the portal wearing a navy blue tunic and black pants. She had short black hair that stopped near the base of her neck.  
  
And her eyes were a beautiful blue green colour. She had a sword strapped across her shoulder in a blue-black sheath that ended about her middle thigh. A pendant glittered in the dark light. " I hear your call and answer master. I am Brumhea, Lu's daughter. I have been sent to protect you Shendu." Her soft voice pierced the thick smoky air like a butter knife through butter. She kneeled at Valmont's feet and remained where she was until Shendu told her to rise. " We must leave this place or we will be trapped here forever." He sighed, clearly confused by the girls eloquence. The woman rose up and pointed in the direction they had come from.  
  
" Then we shall leave master.ask and it will be done." Shendu looked overwhelmed by the attitude exhibited by his newest member. All of the others were unruly and sort of annoying at times, but this girl was polite and courteous and well mannered. This had been the best risk yet. Finn whistled. " Nice looking chick eh boss man? You one lucky son of a bitch big V." He said, running his fingers through his hair.  
  
The girl moved like a strike of lightening. The sword lay poised against Finn's throat in an instant. " I would appreciate it if you would shut the fuck up and talk nicer to a lady." She smiled, drawing the blade closer to his throat. Finn grinned nervously and shook his head. " I was just joking, really. I didn't mean any harm. Just goofing around that's all." He said, sweat sliding down his face.  
  
The girl's hard eyes melted back into their earlier bright blue green. " I should hope so." She said, sheathing her weapon and turning back to Shendu/Valmont. Well, with every good thing comes a bad temper. Shendu supposed shrugging.  
  
Even roses have their thorns. " If you would be so kind as to lead us back to the entrance, I would be ever so grateful." The demon smiled.  
  
The girl nodded and then started walking back down the path they had come from. She led them down path after path, and then some. They reached the gateway at the stroke of dawn, just barely escaping the entire life of prison in the land of the dead.  
  
" Nice place, but I wouldn't like to build a summer home there." Valmont said, chewing his lip impatiently. The undead gatekeeper smiled a gruesome smiled at the lot. " So you managed to retrieve what you came for. Good luck.your diamond in the rough may turn out to be a dud if your not careful." It smiled and then fell to the ground in a heap of dust.  
  
The lake of the dead shimmered and then disappeared into the ground as if it had never been there to begin with. Chow launched himself off the side just as the water was ankle level. Brumhea snagged him in midair and shook her head. " Weren't you told that even one touch of the water can keep you imprisoned there forever? Rushing isn't going to get you out of there any faster then how it got you there in the first place." She chided.  
  
The Chinese dangled from the girls grasp inches from the soggy ground. Shendu looked surprised at the action the girl had taken. Others would have just let the stupid fool drop and be imprisoned, but not this girl. She seemed to be able to see things happened just before they happened. It was strange. This new member was going to be a good addition.  
  
Hak Fuu seemed to have rubbed the girl the wrong way. Somehow, he managed to get her so angry with him that she was just about to kill him by the time they reached the limo. She seemed fairly used to the environment, as if she had been in this world before. Perplexed by her non-surprise by the limo, Valmont asked her if she had been in this world before. She responded with a shrug. " I have been here before, but only in visions. Never in person."  
  
"What do you mean by in visions?" He asked. The woman blinked in half awe. " You've never had a vision? That's strange.in my world; almost everyone has had at least one. I mean, demons and dragons have to at least be sure of what lays ahead." she blinked again and turned to Chow.  
  
He looked at her once and then closed his eyes and fell asleep once more. Ratso slammed on the brakes and let them loose. Once again, Valmont had to pick Finn out of his hair and shove Chow off of his back. But the strange thing was, was Brumhea hadn't moved at all. She had managed to stay precisely where she had been with the greatest of ease. Hak Fuu opened the window that separated the two parts and apologized for the hard breaking. Apparently, a squirrel had run in front of the car and they had narrowly escaped hitting it. Valmont sighed. Things were exactly as they had been hours before. ____________________________________________________________________________  
  
They had all gotten settled in by about the first half hour. Brumhea had been stuck with Chow and was presently pacing the halls. Chow himself was passed out on the couch, drooling on his arm.  
  
Ratso was sleeping with his head on the coffee table. Hak Fuu was in his room, and had refused to come out until he had had his beauty sleep.  
  
Valmont had been too traumatized to sleep and had begun to read his book from where he had left off. Finn was asleep on the floor, too tired to get up and go to his room to get a proper days sleep.  
  
The phone rang loudly, sending their surreal dream world into a loud obnoxious angry one. Brumhea had almost sliced the telephone in half in frustration. Valmont had to grab it from her before she managed to do so.  
  
Finn hadn't woken up, but Ratso had and he was in a bad mood.  
  
Grumbling, he slammed his fist against the table's hard surface shouting profanity. Chow slept peacefully through the entire stream of swearing and managed to get at least more sleep than the others. Valmont's conversation was short and brief. " Yes this is Valmont. Yes the leader of the Dark Hand. Yes. What? No I do not want to do a telemarketing poll. NO. NO. Blue. Red. You have five seconds to hang up or I am going to. overhand.what? No I don't eat escargot. No. No. NO. You have.no." The conversation ended with a slight disappointing beep of the cordless phone hanging up and then realization that he had just been suckered in to another telemarketer poll.  
  
Grumbling, he slammed the phone down and began to go back to his book when the phone rang again. "Hello? What? No. I don't have time for a telemarketing poll so piss off you little.no.I don't have a cat.no.I am not over forty. Am I the head of the household? Who the fuck do you think I am, some bloody four year old? No I am not using Rogaine presently. No I am not .no.stop asking questions! NO I am not going to Bermuda. For the fourth time.NO! I am not. No I don't have a.no! Yes I am a leader of my own business. My name? You should know! You've called me for the fifth time this week! No! I don't want any macaroni and cheese! Shut up! What? The lord of the rings? What about it?.. Have I seen it? No. I haven't had time you stupid fool! How could I have seen it if you keep calling me and asking me? Good Bye!" He hung up once again and then decided to pull the phone cord from the wall and let the rest of them sit in relative peace.  
  
Totally engrossed in his book, Valmont failed to notice that there was an unwanted guest on the balcony. There was an explosion and then the door fell in and the room filled with smoke.  
  
Brumhea took up a fighting stance and prepared for the worst. Chow just kept on sleeping, and rolled over as to not be disturbed. Finn opened one eye and then closed it and rolled out of the way under a low table.  
  
Captain Black walked out of the fog and ordered the men he had with him to surround the members of the Dark Hand. Jackie Chan stood next to him, preparing for battle. Valmont sighted and closed his book. " Why do you people just barge in when things are quiet and no one has tried to open a portal for quite some time? Can't you knock like normal people?" He grumbled tossing the book to the couch.  
  
"Do you want me to get rid of these intruders master?" Brumhea asked, drawing her sword.  
  
" In a non bloody way if you can manage." Valmont said, folding his arms.  
  
The girl smiled and moved fast. She slammed Jackie in the head with her arm and began to beat the crap out of Captain Black. In about fifteen minutes, she had the entire group of thirty men beaten and was standing victoriously. Jackie stood up and prepared a fighter's stance to match the strange girl's.  
  
A smile spread across her face as she moved slowly towards him, circling like a predator.  
  
There was a moment's confusion and then he found himself in a headlock, unable to move an inch. Gagging, he struggled to free himself but found that her arms were vice-like and hard as steel.  
  
He moved fast and tried to kick her in the head but found it impossible to even budge from the kneeling position he was in.  
  
The girl looked to Valmont for instructions on what to do with her victim. " Well.what are you waiting for? Kill him!" Shendu exclaimed happily.  
  
Jackie felt the vice-like hold loosen slightly, just enough so that he could breath. " Excuse me, but I thought you said in a non bloody way. I f I was to finish him, then that would involve a lot of bloodshed and I thought that-" She was cut off by flames bursting from Valmont's mouth. " When I say kill him I mean kill him! NO matter of blood on the carpet will keep me from destroying Jackie Chan, the one and only person who foils our plans! Just do it! Kill him in the most painful way you know!" It hissed.  
  
Valmont felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. This girl he hardly knew was going to kill Jackie Chan in his living room in cold blood. The ever-helpful Shendu persuaded this thought into his mind. The girl's arms moved in a quick tug. They heard a snap and then Jackie Chan hung lifeless in her arms.  
  
There was a scream from Jade and then and usual "Nooooo!" From Tohru. The old man who was the only one who had been able to cast the chi spells ran towards the girl yelling "Jackie!" And then the girl moved, twisting her body so that she had hold of Jackie's body right above her head. She tossed him effortlessly into the crowd of people and was rewarded with almost all of the men pulling out guns. She looked confusedly to Valmont.  
  
Then it struck him.  
  
She couldn't have known what a gun was.  
  
And this ment bad news. She wouldn't know how to dodge something she didn't know about. Captain Black pointed his gun at the girl who looked down the end of the barrel of the gun without fear. "Put your hands up and kneel with your hands on the back of your head. I am warning you. NO funny stuff do you understand? One move and you'll be sorry." The girl looked from the man holding the funny weapon to Valmont. Clearly confused, she turned her head from side to side and then began blinking in confusion. Valmont looked at Captain Black.  
  
" She has no idea what you are holding Black. She doesn't understand what it is." He tried to explain, but he was too late. Captain Black fired the gun and the girl fell to one knee without a cry. She reached down and touched the wound where the bullet had passed through her stomach. Blood dripped down her fingers and dribbled on the carpet between her feet. She tried to stand up and found it almost impossible.  
  
Staggering, the girl slowly dragged herself up with the help of the couch. Everything seemed to go by in slow motion; the world spun hopelessly slow and there was no way to fix what had happened. Captain Black lowered his gun and spoke:" that was for Jackie."  
  
The men behind him spoke nothing, only staring at the girl standing firmly with blood running down her legs.  
  
"I don't understand.all I did was follow orders. Not correctly but nonetheless. Only four hours in this world and look what happened.almost died.it's silly really. Why you humans keep killing each other just to avenge deaths.really life is only a sad thing.it's filled with misery and sadness and all you people can do is kill each other. Really I pity you Captain Black. Because now you have blood stained hands just like the rest of us." The girl's hard green blue eyes softened.  
  
She shook her head from side to side and then focused on the gun in the tall bald man's hands. There was a flash of steel and then the gun fell to the ground in chunks.  
  
The sword tip pointed directly at his heart. Surprised by this change of events, the man stumbled backwards landing next to Jackie's body.  
  
Jackie blinked and sat up dizzy. "What happened?" He groaned, shaking his head. Jade hugged him. "Your alive Jackie! Your alive!"  
  
Valmont looked from Brumhea to Jackie Chan and Jade.  
  
Shendu looked angry. "How dare you not fulfill my wishes? You are a disgraceful soldier and will have to be punished!" He yelled. The girl blinked at her former master. " I think my mother thought too nicely of you Shendu. You are the most heartless being I have ever met.and it really is a pity that you have to share the body of a nice person like Valmont. Deep down, I bet he wouldn't have ordered me to kill him. That's why I didn't kill him. Because I knew that violence in this place means more than it does in my world. You really are a pitiful thing demon." She smiled and wiped the blood off her hand on the edge of her shirt.  
  
Valmont's eyes widened in surprise. How could she have known that he didn't want to kill Chan? It was impossible. And yet the girl seemed unmoved. She stood tall and proud, blood dripping down her body. And then it disappeared. Energy flowed around the girl and engulfed her in a bright violet sheen. ____________________________________________________________________________ _  
  
The sun was coming up in the sky by the time the light had disappeared. Brumhea stood where it had once been and seemed slightly amused by the others facial expressions.  
  
The blood was gone and all that was left was a hole in her shirt. Valmont was grateful that it had ended up this way and not with the death of two people on his hands. Shendu had refused to speak anymore. He sulked in the back of the tall blonde's mind, picking through memories and trying to create a real enough world in the space between consciousness. Captain Black had taken his men and left, off to go fight another battle.  
  
Chow woke up and yawned. " So.what'd I miss?"  
  
Finn crawled out from under the table and smacked him in the head. " Idiot! You missed the most amazing thing in the whole wide fucking world!" 


End file.
